Wednesday, November 7, 2007

Marriage and Divorce

What does it mean when we say forever?

I think in this day and age that word is over-used to the point of almost being meaningless. Look at the divorce rate in our country. I have no room to talk, I am a part of that statistic.. Which even makes it that much worse. People do not give the institution of marriage nearly the respect it deserves.. It took me learning this the hard way to realize what a phenomenon it truly is. I think its to the point now where one in three marriages end in divorce? And off the top of my head I can name at least 10 that i know of that have ended in the past year.. And thats not even sitting down and making a list, thats just spouting off! That number is astronomical!

Where is the issue here? Why is this the case? How have we as a people allowed something as sacred as marriage to become so non-chalant? Is it because people are getting married for the wrong reasons? Because people are too weak to tough it out when things get tough? I think its a combination and then some.

Take the military for example.. The difference between the salary of a married and non-married soldier is over $1000 every month. I know a few that have or will get married just for that reason alone. Finalizing a divorce and then going to the courthouse three days later and marrying some other person, for convience. When I told him I was getting a divorce a friend of mine actually asked me if I wanted to do the very same thing!

Agreeing to marry someone is supposed to be the biggest form of trust and expression of love a human being can give. But how can we be so sure that we have the "one". I thought I did! Obviously I was wrong. As people grow and change sometimes things just dont work out, which is understandable... But how can two people realisticly expect to grow and change together if they have either A) only known eachother a short time, B) get married because of convinience or pregnancy or C) get drunk in vegas one night and think its the greatest idea ever?

When I said my vows I truly meant them with every fiber of my being, I thought he was my "soulmate" so to speak, 2 years later turns out he was not. And it took us 7 years to figure that out. So all you people out there, think about it... What is it going to take for americans and whoever else to realize that it is not to be taken lightly? I am not sure that I will ever marry again, never say never I know but the thought terrifies me. I do wish I had waited, but at the same time I will never regret my marriage. Its going to take someone really really special to get me to do it.

Me writting this blog probably wont change much, but if it makes one person stop and think about it, then its worth my time. The younger and younger people get married the worse our statistics will be. I just wish that this one thing could remain sacred in a society where it seems we have nothing else left.

1 comment:

Oxana said...

keep your chin up, sweety!

love,
O